“All that was left of them were shadows etched into the scorched concrete: incredible power when you think about it,” a horrified US President Joe Biden told G7 leaders at a summit in Hiroshima today, casually detailing the incredible horrors that the United States brought to Japan 77 years ago. back.
« He burned the tissues and cleaned their skeletons too, a hundred and forty thousand of them in an instant, poof, like that! » Biden continued casually, imitating a hand bomb before turning his attention to the issues of the day, imposing more sanctions on Russia and promoting his fancy new phrase « economic coercion, » a term to describe China’s rising trade costs with nations. Westerners as a result of increased political tensions.
“You know, if Russia and China listened like the Japanese did back in the day, we wouldn’t be here right now threatening them,” the 80-year-old told Prime Minister Fumio Kishida, who was too shocked to correct the racial remarks. insult: “God, if only now it were so easy to stop wars by throwing a couple of Fat Mans in Moscow, or a Little Boy or two in Beijing, huh? – they would be fawning over us like you are and giving us territories for strategic missile silos.”
Despite flippantly referring to one of the worst human atrocities ever committed by a nation in recent history, the US president is widely expected to forge a united front against Russia and China with his G7 allies at the site where his country eliminated tens of thousands of innocent people without remorse.
“I really love what you did with the place; I guess it was probably easy to work on a blank canvas,” Biden concluded, before his aides pulled him off the podium.